Brutally Honest

and older who haven't been diagnosed. I think it's amazing that in 2018 kids at school are getting routinely tested and people are getting their message across that these children are not thick, they simply have a different way of seeing words and seeing the world. If like me you have dyslexia you're gonna struggle from the moment a book is put in front of you but you'll also learn to get through it and you will survive. You'll prove yourself to be good at other things and you will succeed. I'm now very proud to talk about my dyslexia. I've got on with it. When I've made speeches I've had to learn them first by heart and on shows like X Factor and America's Got Talent I'm usually the only one at the desk who hasn't got any lines prepared. That's because I'm a very visual person and I say what I see. People seem to like me for that. Richard Branson, Walt Disney, Albert Einstein, Tom Cruise, Jamie Oliver, Steven Spielberg, Marilyn Monroe, Whoopi Goldberg. What have they all got in common? Dyslexia! We are brilliant! I'm no longer ashamed to say I find reading difficult. Just to be clear I'm not sorry I've got dyslexia but I am sorry you won't be hearing my voice on this Audible recording. This book is so important to me and I want you to hear it in the best possible way. Along with the team at Audible we auditioned a few actresses from up north and I found an amazing lady called Zara Abrahams. I just think she is incredible and perfect to do this. She just gets me and really understands this book and more importantly she can read! To be honest and this book is called Brutally Honest it would also be really difficult for me to read this book because it's not just about my dyslexia it's about my emotions and they're still very very very raw and I'm still on my healing journey. It was incredibly hard for me to even write this let alone read it out loud. There are moments in this book that I just cannot relive. It's just too difficult and it's because of this I was gobsmacked that my brave gorgeous daughter Phoenix did want to read the words that she wrote as part of this book. I am completely taken aback by her courage and I was so humbled when she told me the reason she wanted to do it was for me. So as you're listening to this story if this is you or somebody that you know don't feel powerless, feel empowered. Please please do something about it. Thank you very much for listening and now I'm handing this over to Zara. Chapter One. Girl Powerless. What drives a woman to take her own life? What makes a woman believe the only way out is a bottle of pills? I can tell you the answer. Melanie Brown, Scary Spice, that gobby girl from Leeds who ran riot through the whole bloody world with the Spice Girls. The girl cheeky enough to pinch loo roll from Nelson Mandela's house. Sorry to the late Mr. Mandela I absolutely loved you and was beyond privileged to meet you but I also know you had a little chuckle about the loo roll. And cocky enough to crack jokes with HRH Prince Charles. I was girl power. One fifth of that fantastic group of girls who were invincible, hilarious, fearless and bonded like glue. Cheekers to the front, taking the control from men and generally kicking butt big time. And now almost two decades on you still see me in the spotlight on massively successful television shows in Britain, America and Australia, still being loud and proud, still wearing the flag for girl power. But here I am, 39 years of age, staring in the mirror in the ensuite bathroom of my rented house in Kensington, London, holding an open bottle of aspirin from the stash I've stockpiled over the years, putting one pill after another into my mouth, watching myself as I swallow, tears rolling down my cheeks. As each pill goes into my mouth I ask myself, are you sure? And I take another one. Ten, twenty, fifty, a hundred. Are you sure? Everything and nothing is running through my mind. It's Thursday night 11th of December 2014.